Struggle of Consistency: Why is it so hard to develop habits?

Spoiler alert — you already know the answer

Be honest: when was the last time you actively worked on something every single day of the year?

When I posed this question to myself, I genuinely couldn’t remember. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything every day of my life.

To my relief, after speaking with a few of my peers, I realize that I’m not alone in this. A lot of us, despite having a “big picture” idea of what we want for ourselves, struggle with moving towards that vision throughout the year.

We intend to undertake several things a day, telling ourselves that intention is the fuel behind action. Of course, intention alone is not enough. It goes without saying that motivation matters, but we need to consistently act in accordance with that intention.

In a world where we’re told that our “intentions will manifest themselves”, I can see why we fall into the trap of believing that intention is enough. When we get too comfortable with “wanting to” and not “doing”, our sense of purpose becomes diluted.

This is where we falter. Things change, our motivation flickers, and we suddenly can’t commit to all of our goals on a regular basis. We begin to equate intention with action.

That’s when we become okay with skipping a day or two, or seven, or thirty…and our consistency disappears.

When it comes to our “big picture”, we have the power to either step closer or inch away from it every day. The fate of our direction lies in the minute details of daily life.

Do we exercise? Do we write in our journals? Do we practice scales and chords on the keyboard?

These details ultimately comprise the “big picture”.

Of course, we already know this. We know that effort breeds excellence, because we can see evidence of it wherever we look.

Olympic athletes train intensely every day of the year.
The best vocalists rehearse for hours each day.
Legendary writers have been known to pump out thousands of words per day.

What makes these people different? Where does their relentless drive come from? What fuels their consistency?

These experts work on who they want to be. Not just what they want to accomplish.

Consider that for a moment.

The Olympian works towards being a better athlete. Not just winning a gold medal.
The vocalist practices becoming a better musician. Not just achieving worldwide fame.
The writer focuses on being a better wordsmith. Not just becoming a New York Times bestseller.

What these experts have in common is their drive to become, not just achieve. They focus on action, without overthinking what they’re doing or why they’re doing it.

Unlike many of us, they don’t let the “big picture” become an overwhelming distraction. They are able to focus on the present moment without endowing it with the pressure of future goals.

Their consistency remains intact because they have a clear idea of who they want to be. As a result, they are able to do things without fixating their energy on only materialistic aspects of the “big picture”.

How can we do the same?

A research study in 2009 discovered that the easier it is to act out a behaviour without thinking about it, the more likely it is to become a habit. This is a concept called “automaticity”, and it explains why not all habits develop as easily as others.

With this in mind, it’s possible that the trick to consistency is doing things without thinking about their purpose. But how can we possibly do something without thinking about it, or why we’re doing it?

Believe it or not, there’s actually a word for that: fun.

To be consistent, we have to find the fun. When we synchronize our goals with what we enjoy, there’s no reason why we can’t be consistent — we automatically invest in who we are and who we wish to become.

That’s all there is to it.

Writer: Pallavi Mathur

Source:Medium.com